My Family is Weird...

On the way to the damn shower on Sunday, I had to listen to my aunts and Grandma talk about the symptoms of menopause. Apparently, the two aunts and my mom are going through it right now, so when I didn't hear them talk about it, I was either turning into a meat popsicle, because they wanted the air conditioning on, or I was turning into a raisin, because the heat was on. I am thankful that I was in the very back seat of the van, so I didn't get the full blast of the menopausal women.

So, we get to the damn shower and have about 30 minutes to wait until the damn thing begins, so we're sitting in another aunt's foyer talking. My cousin Leaha is the only other one my age, besides the cousin who's preggers, and we're talking about going into adult stores. All of a sudden like 5 of my aunts are right there asking us (ok, me, because Leaha's a good girl) what a dildo looks like. Gah! I was like, "Haven't you ever seen Sex and the City?" And they were like, "No, that's too trashy." But, they insist that I tell them what one looks like, because they have never seen one. Gah! So, I take the safe road and tell them that one looks just like the real thing, only a lot bigger. The aunts seemed to like that idea, which scares me... I hope I don't have to hear a dildo story around the campfire next year at the family reunion. And, it's probably a good thing I don't get embarrassed easily.

So, during the damn shower I had to sit next to preggers cousin and help her with the gift sacks, tissue paper, ect. I had to keep a perpetual fake smile on my face, because everyone was looking our way. I really did not enjoy this, because, well, I really don't care all that much for said preggers cousin. She and I get along ok, but I tend to gravitate towards my more distinguished cousins, because of our backgrounds. Ok, I realize that sounds totally superficial, but that's just the way it is when you have 30+ cousins.

Man, everyday John Kerry gives me more of a reason to believe in him. Today, while in Sioux City, he made and unscheduled stop at an elementary school to tell the kids to vote for him in the mock election on Monday. But, no matter who you're voting for, don't forget to vote on Tuesday. It's the right our forefather's fought and died for!